Continued from Part I of "Brides -- What To Do You If Your Wedding Gets Canceled" Click here if you missed Part I!
You need to “bear up” emotionally. Even if you try to put this behind you as quickly possible, it will resurface for months. For example, you should be prepared to have people stopping you in the street or in the grocery store and asking what your married name is. And of course, you have to explain that no, you’re not married and your name is still the same.
This embarrasses the heck out of the person, and before you know it, you end up consoling them saying things like…
“How would you know?” and “It's alright, I’m working though it.”
I can’t tell you how many times I saw that look of horror on someone’s face and had to explain what happened. For a while, I didn't even want to go out in public.
If after a few months you are still having problems dealing with the disappointment of having your wedding canceled, you need to go and talk to someone. It can be a friend, or perhaps someone that has gone though a similar situation. But if you feel the need, don’t discount talking to a professional therapist. It’s a good idea to let a professional help you deal with your feelings and allow you to move on with your life.
Unfortunately, the next matter you may need to consider is not always a pleasant one… the legalities of the ending of the engagement. A canceled wedding does not always mean the end of the relationship, but if that is the case, I recommend you talk to a lawyer. It will also depend on if you were involved in a common-in-law relationship with that person and what you had invested together.
Having “been there and done that”, here’s my message to any of you brides who have had the proverbial rug pulled out from under you…
Yeah, it hurts. Yeah, it sucks. Yes, it’s totally humiliating. But step back and see the “forest for the trees.” For myself, I came to the conclusion that I had dodged a bullet the day the groom called off the wedding. It was hard lesson to learn but I see now I am better off without him in my life.
Even though it doesn’t feel like it now, the right person for you is “out there” and if you are happy with yourself everything else will fall into place.
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